53 - Different Hours

sometimes i feel like being paranoid

in this case the door to my room is almost and i heard a noise outside and i started planning out exactly what i would do if a gunman broke into our house and went inside. naturally from the architecture of the house he would turn left and walk throgh the hallway that passes my room. naturally as the door is slightly ajar he would push it and see what's inside.

at this point hopefully i would have noticed and got out of my seat, and forgot to turn music off. i would hide at that almost-corner of the room behind the door so that he would have to walk in a couple of steps and look left to see me. he would probably hear me breathing.

by this point my adrenaline rush would have kicked in, and i would attempt some kind of tackle to disarm him, which would not work because i would be half his mass, but hopefully in the struggle he is disoriented enough that i can push past him, and run outside through the door that he left open - because when you break into someone's house you don't close the door behind you.

anyway, hopefully he tries to shoot me and even more hopefully he misses, and thus the rest of my family will be alerted and hopefully get the !#@$ out through the back door.


thankfully my mum will be unharmed as she is on a plane at the moment.

i hope my dad will know better than to be a hero


this is why my essays dont get done.



ill probably regret all of these games im playing

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oh, it's olympics. u know what i would be doing if it weren't year 12 and trials?

not watching the olympics.

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i feel so bad when siblings are separated, forever, without any prior warning. wandering about, searching for someone who's never coming back. your best and only friend besides your mother for the majority of your whole life. i want to say that i'm so sorry, but they can't speak my language.

it's just my belonging creative transposed into real life.

down two semitones.



i kind of regret all of these games i was playing. kind of. not really.

didn't really get much done this weekend. its ok, i still got the night before for everything but latin. as usual.




doing a past paper made me realise that i'm going to need to do a lot more past papers. the good thing is, i haven't needed to look at my theory book yet, and ill have 2 days before each math exam.

i spend a long time, i dont even know how long but it was more than half an hour, stuck on something pretty simple.

You have a parabola y=(x^2+1)/2

find the equation of the lines tangent to this parabola that passes through the origin.

i don't even know how that happened. probably like uni. you know all of this theory and then you forget the basics, like how to multiply and divide.



i don't know what i want to do in uni anymore. do i really want a scholarship

really